Re-Invented
Sometimes we all need to start over, in our lives and in our hearts. Break down and build back up. Do not despair about the future or lament about the past. Instead look for joy in your sorrow and peace in your suffering. Open your heart,lay down your will, and face your pain.
Embrace your sorrow and suffering because God is molding you, so you may find joy and peace. We cannot see clearly out of our grimy windows if they are shut to love. Open them, your eyes your heart. Let God show you how to deal with your pain, what you are going through. Let your relationship with Him grow with your experiences. Learn to not want what you were or be content with who you are, but love who you are going to be. For these experiences on earth will mold you for heaven.
Please never forget to love always and forgive no matter. Keep your heart open to God, look deep inside and you'll see how you are longing for a love deeper than what any earthly thing can give you. I've learned much about love. Here with love comes hurt. It's a given risk one takes. Makes one vulnerable. But the hurting helps one to love with compassion.
So when life here breaks you down to the very core of your being...don't despair. Instead embrace the opportunity to re-invent yourself and allow God to once again be your creator.
God Bless
~Sara Sue Renee
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Beat...
Beat
Breathe, become something else.
Beating over soft sand.
Matching rhythm of the waves.
Becoming part,
of something,
better.
I fall into horse's neck,
bury my face in the mane
Only my eyes look between the ears
Not that I have to know
Where I'm going.
we breathe, last breath.
No more air, 'til the end.
Quick pace, beating the current.
Still racing the wind.
Just me and the horse,
beating odds
of what's against us.
wind, sand, water, salt
disappear.
All that exists is the rhythm
of our hearts
matching
rhythm of the run.
When will we breath again?
Not
Until
We
Run
Out
Of
Adventure...
By: Sara Sue Renee
Breathe, become something else.
Beating over soft sand.
Matching rhythm of the waves.
Becoming part,
of something,
better.
I fall into horse's neck,
bury my face in the mane
Only my eyes look between the ears
Not that I have to know
Where I'm going.
we breathe, last breath.
No more air, 'til the end.
Quick pace, beating the current.
Still racing the wind.
Just me and the horse,
beating odds
of what's against us.
wind, sand, water, salt
disappear.
All that exists is the rhythm
of our hearts
matching
rhythm of the run.
When will we breath again?
Not
Until
We
Run
Out
Of
Adventure...
By: Sara Sue Renee
-untitled-
untitled
Last night the stars did not shine.
Nothing seemed to feel friendly.
The dull sound of the rain slowly put me to sleep.
I dreamed of the rain in slow motion.
Each individual drop tapping against my skin.
Immersing my senses in the cold wet.
I felt the drops scatter into smaller ones.
From my head to my feet they roll.
Blending with my tears.
Falling with my sorrow.
No one knows I cry,
Because the sky crys with me
And hides my tears.
By: Sara Sue Renee
Last night the stars did not shine.
Nothing seemed to feel friendly.
The dull sound of the rain slowly put me to sleep.
I dreamed of the rain in slow motion.
Each individual drop tapping against my skin.
Immersing my senses in the cold wet.
I felt the drops scatter into smaller ones.
From my head to my feet they roll.
Blending with my tears.
Falling with my sorrow.
No one knows I cry,
Because the sky crys with me
And hides my tears.
By: Sara Sue Renee
Dilemma with a Juice Machine...
Dilemma with a Juice Machine...
So, anyone who knows me understands that no day is boring normalcy. I'm always having some type of adventure or dilemma (usually a laughable experience). So the other day after class I decided to buy some OJ from the vending machine.
My next class was in an hour so I thought that it would be great to just relax in the hallway with some fashion magazines (my not so secret weakness) and some sweet goodness of vitamin C. (Or orange juice) $1.25 was pretty expensive for a small bottle of OJ. Especially for a college student like me, always digging through laundry or behind furniture for extra change. But I was thirsty, so I pulled out a dollar and slid it into the machine. Then I took a quarter and pushed it in the change slot and waited for the clink it would make as it hit the bottom.
There was no clink. I must have waited for like 10 seconds!
Almost as quickly as I realized I might have lost my $1.25 forever, and get nothing in return, my hand was reaching towards the return change button. I rapidly pushed the button several times and rose to a slight panic as I realized that getting this OJ was going to take a lot of effort, or I was just gonna be broke and thirsty.
I quickly glanced sideways to see if anyone was around and debated as to what I could do next. Either walk away or fight for my OJ and $1.25
I decided to stay and fight.
With that I started to bang my hand against the slot where my quarter went, figuring the slot was jammed up. I bent down and glared into the quarter slot. Sure enough there were about six quarters jammed inside. I banged harder.
Being unsuccessful in my banging attempts, I took a couple steps back and threw my body against the machine, hoping to rattle the jam loose. Nothing. I tried my body slam again to no avail.
Suddenly I heard someone laughing, I turned around and saw some guy who had come down to get a drink out of the same machine and had caught a glimpse of my struggle. I must have looked pretty pathetic, because he walked up with a sympathetic smile and rocked the juice machine back and forth. Something I was too small to do.
Smiling I thought "Now, I'm gonna get my OJ!" Ya, no such luck. Turning around he smiled and shrugged his shoulders. I thanked him as he left and turned to face the machine. It was just Me against It now.
I got out my keys and pushed one into the slot to jiggle around inside. I did this forever!! Don't ask me why, it's amazing what a college student will do for a quarter. At least one as broke as I am. While my key was shifting quarters one slid out of the slot into my hand. 5 min. later I decided to forfeit my dollar and walk away.
I sat in the hall frustrated from losing the struggle and more thirsty than before. As I opened my magazine I realized how much life can be like this dilemma with the juice machine. We invest so much into our choices, relationships and so many other things, hoping to get something of more or equal value in return.
But many times we get back less than we gave, if anything. When that happens who doesn't get angry or frustrated? Who doesn't struggle with resentment and bitterness?
Although these instances are many, there is one investment that is priceless and you can invest everything you are into this and find that you will receive more than you ever thought possible!
That investment is choosing to live in God. I have definitely found that investing in this has given me the strength and open mindedness to not become discouraged when what I invest in down here in this world doesn't work out.
I choose to invest in God instead of worldly things because life is so unpredictable and who wants to struggle with the juice machines their whole lives? Putting God first has given me the security in knowing that if I am angry He will help me not hurt others, if I am sad He will be my comfort, and if my heart is broken He will fix it faster and better than I could fix it myself.
Yes, I struggle. But most of my struggles are not unnecessary. They help me grow. Sure some choices I make down here as far as relationships, school and careers may not go so well.
But by making God first in my life, I realize that I may not get that OJ I had previously paid for and I may have to forfeit my dollar, but the water fountain around the corner will always be running with cool refreshing water, it's free and is better for your body anyhow.
So, anyone who knows me understands that no day is boring normalcy. I'm always having some type of adventure or dilemma (usually a laughable experience). So the other day after class I decided to buy some OJ from the vending machine.
My next class was in an hour so I thought that it would be great to just relax in the hallway with some fashion magazines (my not so secret weakness) and some sweet goodness of vitamin C. (Or orange juice) $1.25 was pretty expensive for a small bottle of OJ. Especially for a college student like me, always digging through laundry or behind furniture for extra change. But I was thirsty, so I pulled out a dollar and slid it into the machine. Then I took a quarter and pushed it in the change slot and waited for the clink it would make as it hit the bottom.
There was no clink. I must have waited for like 10 seconds!
Almost as quickly as I realized I might have lost my $1.25 forever, and get nothing in return, my hand was reaching towards the return change button. I rapidly pushed the button several times and rose to a slight panic as I realized that getting this OJ was going to take a lot of effort, or I was just gonna be broke and thirsty.
I quickly glanced sideways to see if anyone was around and debated as to what I could do next. Either walk away or fight for my OJ and $1.25
I decided to stay and fight.
With that I started to bang my hand against the slot where my quarter went, figuring the slot was jammed up. I bent down and glared into the quarter slot. Sure enough there were about six quarters jammed inside. I banged harder.
Being unsuccessful in my banging attempts, I took a couple steps back and threw my body against the machine, hoping to rattle the jam loose. Nothing. I tried my body slam again to no avail.
Suddenly I heard someone laughing, I turned around and saw some guy who had come down to get a drink out of the same machine and had caught a glimpse of my struggle. I must have looked pretty pathetic, because he walked up with a sympathetic smile and rocked the juice machine back and forth. Something I was too small to do.
Smiling I thought "Now, I'm gonna get my OJ!" Ya, no such luck. Turning around he smiled and shrugged his shoulders. I thanked him as he left and turned to face the machine. It was just Me against It now.
I got out my keys and pushed one into the slot to jiggle around inside. I did this forever!! Don't ask me why, it's amazing what a college student will do for a quarter. At least one as broke as I am. While my key was shifting quarters one slid out of the slot into my hand. 5 min. later I decided to forfeit my dollar and walk away.
I sat in the hall frustrated from losing the struggle and more thirsty than before. As I opened my magazine I realized how much life can be like this dilemma with the juice machine. We invest so much into our choices, relationships and so many other things, hoping to get something of more or equal value in return.
But many times we get back less than we gave, if anything. When that happens who doesn't get angry or frustrated? Who doesn't struggle with resentment and bitterness?
Although these instances are many, there is one investment that is priceless and you can invest everything you are into this and find that you will receive more than you ever thought possible!
That investment is choosing to live in God. I have definitely found that investing in this has given me the strength and open mindedness to not become discouraged when what I invest in down here in this world doesn't work out.
I choose to invest in God instead of worldly things because life is so unpredictable and who wants to struggle with the juice machines their whole lives? Putting God first has given me the security in knowing that if I am angry He will help me not hurt others, if I am sad He will be my comfort, and if my heart is broken He will fix it faster and better than I could fix it myself.
Yes, I struggle. But most of my struggles are not unnecessary. They help me grow. Sure some choices I make down here as far as relationships, school and careers may not go so well.
But by making God first in my life, I realize that I may not get that OJ I had previously paid for and I may have to forfeit my dollar, but the water fountain around the corner will always be running with cool refreshing water, it's free and is better for your body anyhow.
A Calm in the Chaos...
It was a HOT day. Unusually hot for me, considering Im from New Hampshire, and Arizona is much hotter during the summer time. We were going to have an amazing week! We were going to drive out to the Grand Canyon, and hike down to the bottom. After, we were planning to hike back up and believe me; I wasnt looking forward to that part as much.
We packed up the motor home and hopped in to start on our way. I was soooo relieved to be in something air-conditioned. Ive always been the type of person who loves to be freezing cold and then warm up. My choice of seating in the motor home was up on the bed above the driver and passenger seat. I put my headphones on and turned up my music. Ready to travel the day away. Ready to see the sights, that is if I could stay awake. There was a nice window across the front of the loft I was in and the sun beat in while the air conditioner blew at my feet making it just warm and cool enough to doze off and eventually fall fast asleep.
I remember this next moment so vividly, muffled voices and footsteps, doors slamming, and the sound of my Celine Dion cd slowly becoming clearer as well as this faint beeping noise. I smelt smoke, I was dreaming about a fire. It was so real; I could hear panic in the voices around me. The beeping noise was becoming increasingly louder, then with a sudden lurch I came to my senses and opened my eyes only to see smoke piling into the loft I was laying in. I sat up and looked through the window that was next to me and saw my brother, mum and dad across the street staring in horror at the motor home.
I jumped down off the bed. I had this panicky feeling in my chest that I tried to ignore as I crawled under the loft into the driving part of the motor home. I looked at the passenger door and the driver door and all I could see were flames. The panic feeling grew larger.
I ran to the middle of the motor home to the door we normally used for when it was parked and were at camp. Just as I opened the door to step out two walls of flames rose up on both sides of the motor home. The wind that these walls of flames created knocked me to the floor. I started to cry. The panic started to show, I was starting to breath in smoke and was becoming so disorientated.
I grabbed a pot hanging on the wall and ran to the back of the motor home. I started to bang the window as hard as I could, not even a crack. I started to kick at it with my feet. Panic set in and I started screaming hysterically.
Then, I remember everything becoming silent. I could not hear the fire alarm. I was screaming and coughing and couldn't even hear that. I was not aware of where I was anymore, I cant even remember seeing. I remember praying frantically inside my head, I dont want to die, I dont want to die, please God I dont want to die, Sara, dont die get out dont die. Right about then I started to feel so peaceful inside. Like I just knew all was going to be ok. I just kind of stood in the middle of the motor home with all the chaos silently around me. Then my senses came back on and I heard my dad.
He was calling from the front of the motor home. Up near the drivers seat. I ran to his voice as fast as I could and crawled in his arms. He pulled me out and helped me across the street. The fire on the driver side had somehow stopped and he was able to get me.
A couple cars had pulled over to help, and a nice woman helped me into one. I was shaking so hard I couldnt even hold the cup of water she had tried to give me. Someone handed me a blanket and I wrapped myself in it. Even though it was 95 outside I was so cold.
I turned around in my seat and watched the fire catch to the paint, and quickly envelope the whole vehicle. The window that I had tried to bang open exploded, one by one the tires popped. The flames made me cringe. I have never felt so helpless in my entire lifetime as I did then.
It took over an hour for the fire truck to come. We were traveling on a back road through the mountains, so they had to get water elsewhere before they came. The motor home was gone in 20 min. By the time they were there, the only remnants of the motor home were the seat frames and bits of unidentifiable pieces.
Our family was blessed that day. Erik and mum had second-degree burns on their feet because they didnt have time to put on socks and shoes and the pavement burnt their feet. My dad only had the hair on his legs singed off when he ran up to the motor home to get me. And me I escaped with my life. My dad and I stayed behind with the firemen while Erik and mum were brought to the hospital. As we talked with one fireman he asked us how long I had been in the motor home. My dad estimated about a couple minuets. I told him about the smoke, and how packed the motor home was with it. The fireman said any more time in there I would have been dead.
I cannot say that day God chose to let me live. However, if that is what you choose to take from this I do understand where you are coming from. But this is a different convo. and is not my focus of the story
During that very moment when all turned silent in the fire I know I was not by myself. Never in my life have I felt so sure of everything I believed in. At that moment I knew that whether I lived or died didnt matter, it was my faith that mattered. I had found calm in the chaos.
You may say, Well, it was God with you. It was a miracle! And maybe it was
Or you may be reading this and thinking Im crazy. Maybe you dont believe in God. I understand. Its a hard thing. I cannot prove to you that God does exist, nor do I want to. I believe God is a God of choice, and it is up to an individual to decide whether they choose to believe or not believe. God would not force an individual to decide so neither will I. Its up to us. Do we choose to accept or deny good? Do we choose to love or to hate? Do we choose self or higher purpose?
I am leaving the conclusion as to how I managed to find a calm in that fire up to you. Either way it was a happy ending for me. But whichever way, by chance or by miracle, I am happy I have chosen to have faith.
By: Sara Sue Renee
"Faith certainly tells us what the senses do not, but not the contrary of what they see; it is above, not against them."
~Blaise Pascal
We packed up the motor home and hopped in to start on our way. I was soooo relieved to be in something air-conditioned. Ive always been the type of person who loves to be freezing cold and then warm up. My choice of seating in the motor home was up on the bed above the driver and passenger seat. I put my headphones on and turned up my music. Ready to travel the day away. Ready to see the sights, that is if I could stay awake. There was a nice window across the front of the loft I was in and the sun beat in while the air conditioner blew at my feet making it just warm and cool enough to doze off and eventually fall fast asleep.
I remember this next moment so vividly, muffled voices and footsteps, doors slamming, and the sound of my Celine Dion cd slowly becoming clearer as well as this faint beeping noise. I smelt smoke, I was dreaming about a fire. It was so real; I could hear panic in the voices around me. The beeping noise was becoming increasingly louder, then with a sudden lurch I came to my senses and opened my eyes only to see smoke piling into the loft I was laying in. I sat up and looked through the window that was next to me and saw my brother, mum and dad across the street staring in horror at the motor home.
I jumped down off the bed. I had this panicky feeling in my chest that I tried to ignore as I crawled under the loft into the driving part of the motor home. I looked at the passenger door and the driver door and all I could see were flames. The panic feeling grew larger.
I ran to the middle of the motor home to the door we normally used for when it was parked and were at camp. Just as I opened the door to step out two walls of flames rose up on both sides of the motor home. The wind that these walls of flames created knocked me to the floor. I started to cry. The panic started to show, I was starting to breath in smoke and was becoming so disorientated.
I grabbed a pot hanging on the wall and ran to the back of the motor home. I started to bang the window as hard as I could, not even a crack. I started to kick at it with my feet. Panic set in and I started screaming hysterically.
Then, I remember everything becoming silent. I could not hear the fire alarm. I was screaming and coughing and couldn't even hear that. I was not aware of where I was anymore, I cant even remember seeing. I remember praying frantically inside my head, I dont want to die, I dont want to die, please God I dont want to die, Sara, dont die get out dont die. Right about then I started to feel so peaceful inside. Like I just knew all was going to be ok. I just kind of stood in the middle of the motor home with all the chaos silently around me. Then my senses came back on and I heard my dad.
He was calling from the front of the motor home. Up near the drivers seat. I ran to his voice as fast as I could and crawled in his arms. He pulled me out and helped me across the street. The fire on the driver side had somehow stopped and he was able to get me.
A couple cars had pulled over to help, and a nice woman helped me into one. I was shaking so hard I couldnt even hold the cup of water she had tried to give me. Someone handed me a blanket and I wrapped myself in it. Even though it was 95 outside I was so cold.
I turned around in my seat and watched the fire catch to the paint, and quickly envelope the whole vehicle. The window that I had tried to bang open exploded, one by one the tires popped. The flames made me cringe. I have never felt so helpless in my entire lifetime as I did then.
It took over an hour for the fire truck to come. We were traveling on a back road through the mountains, so they had to get water elsewhere before they came. The motor home was gone in 20 min. By the time they were there, the only remnants of the motor home were the seat frames and bits of unidentifiable pieces.
Our family was blessed that day. Erik and mum had second-degree burns on their feet because they didnt have time to put on socks and shoes and the pavement burnt their feet. My dad only had the hair on his legs singed off when he ran up to the motor home to get me. And me I escaped with my life. My dad and I stayed behind with the firemen while Erik and mum were brought to the hospital. As we talked with one fireman he asked us how long I had been in the motor home. My dad estimated about a couple minuets. I told him about the smoke, and how packed the motor home was with it. The fireman said any more time in there I would have been dead.
I cannot say that day God chose to let me live. However, if that is what you choose to take from this I do understand where you are coming from. But this is a different convo. and is not my focus of the story
During that very moment when all turned silent in the fire I know I was not by myself. Never in my life have I felt so sure of everything I believed in. At that moment I knew that whether I lived or died didnt matter, it was my faith that mattered. I had found calm in the chaos.
You may say, Well, it was God with you. It was a miracle! And maybe it was
Or you may be reading this and thinking Im crazy. Maybe you dont believe in God. I understand. Its a hard thing. I cannot prove to you that God does exist, nor do I want to. I believe God is a God of choice, and it is up to an individual to decide whether they choose to believe or not believe. God would not force an individual to decide so neither will I. Its up to us. Do we choose to accept or deny good? Do we choose to love or to hate? Do we choose self or higher purpose?
I am leaving the conclusion as to how I managed to find a calm in that fire up to you. Either way it was a happy ending for me. But whichever way, by chance or by miracle, I am happy I have chosen to have faith.
By: Sara Sue Renee
"Faith certainly tells us what the senses do not, but not the contrary of what they see; it is above, not against them."
~Blaise Pascal
Growing...
Growing...
I wrote this poem after my grandma died of cancer. During high school I learnt a lot about life and what to expect from it. But I also know the great joy that comes from living and loving. And I know that someday, I'll never have to think about dying...
A seed is planted in the ground,
Just like a child put into earth.
Every year the young tree stretches it branches,
Starting to explore this new land.
The same does baby touching everthing at hand.
Both the tree and the child, grow with their hands outstretched towards the sun.
Some day they will reach it, when they are old and far from young.
Every time I shed my leaves a new part of life begins for me.
A life of adventure, full of lessons, and fun.
Even though I'm in my twenties, for me...
Live has just begun.
I make my own path up, just like the tree growing towards the sun.
I see my elders pass away, and new children come and come.
I grow through life's barriers of selfishness and heartache.
I know I will be scarred with my many sins, but I will always stand tall.
I will always try to be happy, and notice the blessings around me.
And when I get there someday, I will take my elders place.
Then I will watch new trees grow, reaching towards the sun.
I will see them be happy and see them be sad...
But with tears of joy in my eyes, because I know that someday...
Someday, when I am gone, they will take my place.
They will grow to be something like me and the will win life's race.
And so it will continue until the old tree and I have gone.
But right now I am in my young life and my life I will live on.
By: Sara Sue Renee
I wrote this poem after my grandma died of cancer. During high school I learnt a lot about life and what to expect from it. But I also know the great joy that comes from living and loving. And I know that someday, I'll never have to think about dying...
A seed is planted in the ground,
Just like a child put into earth.
Every year the young tree stretches it branches,
Starting to explore this new land.
The same does baby touching everthing at hand.
Both the tree and the child, grow with their hands outstretched towards the sun.
Some day they will reach it, when they are old and far from young.
Every time I shed my leaves a new part of life begins for me.
A life of adventure, full of lessons, and fun.
Even though I'm in my twenties, for me...
Live has just begun.
I make my own path up, just like the tree growing towards the sun.
I see my elders pass away, and new children come and come.
I grow through life's barriers of selfishness and heartache.
I know I will be scarred with my many sins, but I will always stand tall.
I will always try to be happy, and notice the blessings around me.
And when I get there someday, I will take my elders place.
Then I will watch new trees grow, reaching towards the sun.
I will see them be happy and see them be sad...
But with tears of joy in my eyes, because I know that someday...
Someday, when I am gone, they will take my place.
They will grow to be something like me and the will win life's race.
And so it will continue until the old tree and I have gone.
But right now I am in my young life and my life I will live on.
By: Sara Sue Renee
Today I killed a chicken...
Today I killed a chicken...
I hate chickens, it's the one of the birds that annoys me the most besides roosters. Yes, they are different but without one there wouldn't be the other. The world would be a better place with out chickens and roosters. At least I think so. No mess, and no worries about a rooster attacking you if you happen to walk too close to the coop.
That's not exactly the type of chicken I want to talk about though. So don't go thinking I'm a literal chicken killer, cause I'm not. The type of chicken that I am addressing is the one that lives inside all of us. Those deep dark secret fears that make us... Well, chickens!
This story happened a while back, so the title is more like a couple years ago I killed a chicken, but I wrote this the day I killed a chicken...Hence the title.
Here goes...
My family loves adventure. Every year we do something so amazing! So spectacular! So COOL!! SO DAVITT!! SO... SO... adventurous. This one adventure happened to be a white water rafting trip through the Grand Canyon.
Now, there is some amount of laziness we all inherit, thus our family choosing the motorized raft...as well as the fact there was like a five year waiting list for the paddle rafts. But all was good as we pulled up to the starting point in our van.
Once we got there we filed out of the van and practically fell over each other to get to the riverside. The water was a dark clear blue, and ICE cold. There was NO way I wasn't looking forward to all that was to come.
The rafting experience was amazing. We would sit on the sides of the raft and hang on for dear life (well not that badly cause if we fell we wouldn't have died) and the raft would be bucking like crazy. All of us would scream and laugh. It was the greatest fun. Along the river side there would be little beaches and this was where we'd set up for camp.
One day we'd set camp at one of these places, and the guy in charge of the raft told us he wanted to take us somewhere. So we all followed through the twists in the Canyon walls (it's so different in the bottom) to a beautiful water fall pouring out of a cave into a deep pool of water below. It took everyone's breath away.
Zach (the son of the person in charge of the raft), I don't know why I remember his name but maybe it's because he was really cute, went and dove into the pool and swam in behind the waterfall. The next second we saw him standing above in the cave the water was coming out of. He took a couple steps back and made this huge leap into the pool of water below.
Erik, my brother not being able to resist the fun ran to follow. I stayed behind. One reason...I'm a BIG chicken when it comes to falling down from high places fast, also at this time I hated jumping in water. That's why my favorite ride at the amusement park was the merrygoround. Didn't get wet and didn't have the fast falling sensation. I liked to play it safe!
After seeing them jump a couple times I started to wonder what it was like in that cave. How amazing would that be to just climb up there and see what lies behind the water fall. I couldn't stop myself...no sooner had my curiosity got the best of me I had already swam behind the fall.
I climbed up into the cave and crawled towards the second level. It was a slippery climb, but I made it. It was awesome. I sat on the side and watched Zach and Erik take a couple more jumps. On their fifth time coming up they told me that the group was ready to go, so I got up and proceeded to go down the way I came up and fell flat on my butt.
There was no way I was going to be able to climb down the same way. The rocks were so slimy and there were not enough places to gain a good grip to safely get down. I knew my only option was to jump, and at that very moment I hated myself for climbing my way into this situation.
I stood at the lip of the waterfall with Zach and Erik behind me coaxing me to go. I was shaking from head to toe, and not because I was cold. Because my inner chicken had come out and did not want to face its fear.
Erik was telling me I'd be okay. My inner chicken was telling me I'd die. Zach was telling me it was very safe. My inner chicken was telling me he was an idiot. The group, who was watching, started to cheer me on. They told me I could do it. My inner chicken was telling me the cave would make a very nice home.
I must have stood there shaking for 5 min. or so. It was probably less, but felt like eternity!! While I was standing there Zach gave me an option out. He had found a way for me to climb down. But Erik said it was time to face my fear. He had done it six times and was okay. It was time to take a leap of faith. Faith in my brothers jump, faith in Zach's jump, neither of them had been hurt, they were fine. It was time for me to kill my inner chicken.
With that last thought I took a couple steps back and leaped off the lip of the fall and into the pool below. I could hear the roar of the falls above me as I sank to the bottom of the little pool. I must have looked like a gigantic puffer fish with my eyes wide open with an "Oh my gosh I jumped" look and my cheecks puffed out to capacity. I had taken a huge breath of air before I took the leap. I mean really, when you think you're gonna die you wanna breathe all the air you can get!
Slowly my body started to rise to the top and before I knew it my head was above the surface of the water and I was swimming back to the...(you thought I was gonna say shore weren't you!) cave!!! I climbed up a second time and this time without even thinking I leapt off the edge and into the water below. I had killed my inner chicken!! I had made my leap of faith and it was a successful one!
There are so many things in life that hold us back. So many fears that won't allow us to step beyond our comfort zones and experience life. I know that I have so many more chickens inside of me that need to go, and it's not just with things like roller coasters and sky diving... It's graduating school, it's choosing my career path, it's sickness, it's love, it's choosing to believe in God everyday. So many things I am afraid and hesitant to do. Why?
Because I don't know what's going to happen? Because I don't want to look stupid? Because I don't want to be weak? Most likely...But how silly are those reasons for being afraid? I look back at that amazing feeling of exhilaration I had, when I jumped off that waterfall, and how that felt. And how I wanted to do that again and again afterward. If we could just take a leap of faith everyday and believe that if God knows when the smallest sparrow falls than he's def. watching over us. If one could just believe that... Than loving would be easier, and if one got sick they could still be strong, and no matter what career one chose God would help them make a difference.
Look inside yourself...What are your fears? What is your inner chicken telling you not to do that is keeping you from achieving greatness in life? If I could illustrate a picture for you it would be like this...
You're standing at the edge of a waterfall...Over 10 ft. Imagine a height that scares you a little. Your inner chicken is telling you not to jump and it takes all your might just to keep your eyes open. God and all of heaven is waiting down at the bottom of the falls in the deep roaring water below. Your angel, and your friends, who have already leapt, are standing behind you telling you it's okay. You can jump. The devil has told you he's found an easier way out.(Sorry Zach, you are a great guy just an illustration) Your inner chicken is telling you not to jump, not to do anything. You don't need the faith! Keep the chicken because the chicken doesn't want to die just yet!
You take a deep breath, a couple of them. You take a couple steps back and...
Well, you tell me...Are you going to take the faith? Or are you going to keep hold of that chicken?
My advice to you is simple...Like I said in the beginning...Chickens are annoying, messy and in a round about way they create roosters, which might attack you if you're walking to close to the coop. So if I were you, I'd take the faith and kill that chicken!!
God Bless.
By: Sara Sue Renee
I hate chickens, it's the one of the birds that annoys me the most besides roosters. Yes, they are different but without one there wouldn't be the other. The world would be a better place with out chickens and roosters. At least I think so. No mess, and no worries about a rooster attacking you if you happen to walk too close to the coop.
That's not exactly the type of chicken I want to talk about though. So don't go thinking I'm a literal chicken killer, cause I'm not. The type of chicken that I am addressing is the one that lives inside all of us. Those deep dark secret fears that make us... Well, chickens!
This story happened a while back, so the title is more like a couple years ago I killed a chicken, but I wrote this the day I killed a chicken...Hence the title.
Here goes...
My family loves adventure. Every year we do something so amazing! So spectacular! So COOL!! SO DAVITT!! SO... SO... adventurous. This one adventure happened to be a white water rafting trip through the Grand Canyon.
Now, there is some amount of laziness we all inherit, thus our family choosing the motorized raft...as well as the fact there was like a five year waiting list for the paddle rafts. But all was good as we pulled up to the starting point in our van.
Once we got there we filed out of the van and practically fell over each other to get to the riverside. The water was a dark clear blue, and ICE cold. There was NO way I wasn't looking forward to all that was to come.
The rafting experience was amazing. We would sit on the sides of the raft and hang on for dear life (well not that badly cause if we fell we wouldn't have died) and the raft would be bucking like crazy. All of us would scream and laugh. It was the greatest fun. Along the river side there would be little beaches and this was where we'd set up for camp.
One day we'd set camp at one of these places, and the guy in charge of the raft told us he wanted to take us somewhere. So we all followed through the twists in the Canyon walls (it's so different in the bottom) to a beautiful water fall pouring out of a cave into a deep pool of water below. It took everyone's breath away.
Zach (the son of the person in charge of the raft), I don't know why I remember his name but maybe it's because he was really cute, went and dove into the pool and swam in behind the waterfall. The next second we saw him standing above in the cave the water was coming out of. He took a couple steps back and made this huge leap into the pool of water below.
Erik, my brother not being able to resist the fun ran to follow. I stayed behind. One reason...I'm a BIG chicken when it comes to falling down from high places fast, also at this time I hated jumping in water. That's why my favorite ride at the amusement park was the merrygoround. Didn't get wet and didn't have the fast falling sensation. I liked to play it safe!
After seeing them jump a couple times I started to wonder what it was like in that cave. How amazing would that be to just climb up there and see what lies behind the water fall. I couldn't stop myself...no sooner had my curiosity got the best of me I had already swam behind the fall.
I climbed up into the cave and crawled towards the second level. It was a slippery climb, but I made it. It was awesome. I sat on the side and watched Zach and Erik take a couple more jumps. On their fifth time coming up they told me that the group was ready to go, so I got up and proceeded to go down the way I came up and fell flat on my butt.
There was no way I was going to be able to climb down the same way. The rocks were so slimy and there were not enough places to gain a good grip to safely get down. I knew my only option was to jump, and at that very moment I hated myself for climbing my way into this situation.
I stood at the lip of the waterfall with Zach and Erik behind me coaxing me to go. I was shaking from head to toe, and not because I was cold. Because my inner chicken had come out and did not want to face its fear.
Erik was telling me I'd be okay. My inner chicken was telling me I'd die. Zach was telling me it was very safe. My inner chicken was telling me he was an idiot. The group, who was watching, started to cheer me on. They told me I could do it. My inner chicken was telling me the cave would make a very nice home.
I must have stood there shaking for 5 min. or so. It was probably less, but felt like eternity!! While I was standing there Zach gave me an option out. He had found a way for me to climb down. But Erik said it was time to face my fear. He had done it six times and was okay. It was time to take a leap of faith. Faith in my brothers jump, faith in Zach's jump, neither of them had been hurt, they were fine. It was time for me to kill my inner chicken.
With that last thought I took a couple steps back and leaped off the lip of the fall and into the pool below. I could hear the roar of the falls above me as I sank to the bottom of the little pool. I must have looked like a gigantic puffer fish with my eyes wide open with an "Oh my gosh I jumped" look and my cheecks puffed out to capacity. I had taken a huge breath of air before I took the leap. I mean really, when you think you're gonna die you wanna breathe all the air you can get!
Slowly my body started to rise to the top and before I knew it my head was above the surface of the water and I was swimming back to the...(you thought I was gonna say shore weren't you!) cave!!! I climbed up a second time and this time without even thinking I leapt off the edge and into the water below. I had killed my inner chicken!! I had made my leap of faith and it was a successful one!
There are so many things in life that hold us back. So many fears that won't allow us to step beyond our comfort zones and experience life. I know that I have so many more chickens inside of me that need to go, and it's not just with things like roller coasters and sky diving... It's graduating school, it's choosing my career path, it's sickness, it's love, it's choosing to believe in God everyday. So many things I am afraid and hesitant to do. Why?
Because I don't know what's going to happen? Because I don't want to look stupid? Because I don't want to be weak? Most likely...But how silly are those reasons for being afraid? I look back at that amazing feeling of exhilaration I had, when I jumped off that waterfall, and how that felt. And how I wanted to do that again and again afterward. If we could just take a leap of faith everyday and believe that if God knows when the smallest sparrow falls than he's def. watching over us. If one could just believe that... Than loving would be easier, and if one got sick they could still be strong, and no matter what career one chose God would help them make a difference.
Look inside yourself...What are your fears? What is your inner chicken telling you not to do that is keeping you from achieving greatness in life? If I could illustrate a picture for you it would be like this...
You're standing at the edge of a waterfall...Over 10 ft. Imagine a height that scares you a little. Your inner chicken is telling you not to jump and it takes all your might just to keep your eyes open. God and all of heaven is waiting down at the bottom of the falls in the deep roaring water below. Your angel, and your friends, who have already leapt, are standing behind you telling you it's okay. You can jump. The devil has told you he's found an easier way out.(Sorry Zach, you are a great guy just an illustration) Your inner chicken is telling you not to jump, not to do anything. You don't need the faith! Keep the chicken because the chicken doesn't want to die just yet!
You take a deep breath, a couple of them. You take a couple steps back and...
Well, you tell me...Are you going to take the faith? Or are you going to keep hold of that chicken?
My advice to you is simple...Like I said in the beginning...Chickens are annoying, messy and in a round about way they create roosters, which might attack you if you're walking to close to the coop. So if I were you, I'd take the faith and kill that chicken!!
God Bless.
By: Sara Sue Renee
A TRUE Fish Story..
A TRUE Fish Story...
I would have to say that out of all the seasons in New England summer and fall are my favorite. The reason being, I am able to be at the beach, or there are no bugs and I can ride horses without being miserable. But seeing as it is almost summertime, this is the season I am going to pull the weekly devotional from.
Summer is a time where we can choose from a variety of activities whether it be swimming, working, surfing, horseback riding, hiking etc. My personal favorite activity is being on the beach. I love the waves and the wind and the salt. I have always gotten very excited for summer ever since I was a child and I still do.
This one particular summer, my family was just chillin at home but every Saturday we would either go on a hike or to the ocean. This particular Saturday it was the ocean. I could barely sit still in the car as we drove up to Maine. Erik and I had crammed the car full of beach stuff. We had stuff for crab catching, boogie boards, a skim board, towels chairs, the works. Oh, and Erik and my dad had also brought their ocean fishing rod.
It was a goal of theirs to catch a Striper fish. Thats a fish about the size of an adults forearm or bigger. I wasnt into fishing, but I was into catching crabs. Maybe its the instant gratification thing for me. Crabs are pretty dumb, and all I had to do was mash up some Mackerel, put it in a net and lower the net down from the bridge and wait maybe ten seconds or so to pull about 5 crabs out of the water. Waiting for hours to catch a huge fish just wasnt for me.
We got to the beach and Erik and I grabbed our boards and ran to the ocean. Its still our favorite and first thing we do now. Anyhow, we stayed in there until our bodies had turned blue, then it was time to warm up in the sun and catch fish, crabs, whatever came our way. Erik was determined that this was the day he was going to catch a Striper.
The place where we would go was just over the sand dunes at the mouth of the river that emptied into the ocean. I sat on the bridge going over the river with my net, and Erik walked a ways down the river, hoping to find that one lucky spot. I watched Erik as I absent-mindedly pulled my net out of the water (Very carefully so no crabs would let go.) and emptied the crabs into a pail sitting next to me.
Erik threw his first cast.
His second cast.... his third...fourth.... I was becoming hypnotized just watching his continuing casting motions that came one right after the other.
His bait was the head of the Mackerel fish we had bought. He used it like a lure casting out and reeling in. Over and over again. Fishing can be sooooo monotonous...
After a half hour of watching him and sitting in the warm sun I started to daydream. I was well off in another world when all of the sudden I felt a sharp pull at my net. Looking down to see what had pulled the net so hard I noticed the BIGGEST Striper fish hiding under the bridge. It swam towards my little net and pulled at it again. It was going after the fish that I was using to catch crabs. My mouth dropped open and I looked up the river only to see my discouraged brother way off in the distance. Casting and reeling. Casting and reeling.
I wondered if I should shout to him. Would he make it in time? Would I scare the fish away? In the end I decided to yell for him. I knew hed be upset if I didnt and with that I shouted for Erik and told him to hurry to the bridge.
It took Erik a couple of minuets to reach the bridge because he had to climb over many rocks. While he was climbing I kept my net full of mashed fish as still as the current would let me, to keep the Striper interested, and not attract other little kids and their nets to the fish.
Erik was nearing the side of the bridge and while he was still on the bank he looked over and noticed what I had called him for. He stopped dead in his tracks. I knew he was thinking, This is it! This is my day!! He started to double check his bait and line and got ready to cast. Just as he did a little kid on the bridge noticed the fish and yelled out to his friends. All the kids swarmed around me, I became busy telling them not to throw their nets down and motioned for Erik to move along and just cast his rod.
The next moments were pretty chaotic. The kids on the bridge were shouting and close to running in the river to catch the fish with their hands. The seagulls had come because all of the kids had brought up their nets full of meat and left them sitting on the bridge. I was keeping them (the kids and seagulls) back. I wanted to set Erik up for success. Erik finally got it together and cast out his bait and just as the bait was about to hit the water, a seagull swooped down and caught the lure with his beak.
The fish finally noticed all the chaos and started to jet down the river, out towards the ocean. Meanwhile Erik was left reeling in a seagull that by all means possible was not going to let Erik have his bait back. The seagull flew higher and higher. Eriks line was getting longer and longer. Erik was reeling and reeling and the seagull was pulling back.
One adult walked by and commented on what a cool kite Erik had and all the kids on the bridge started to laugh. Erik played tug o war with this seagull for a good minute or so and finally the line snapped and the seagull flew off with its prize.
Erik trudged up the bridge and sat beside me. He was never going to catch a Striper. I told him not to be discouraged. I pointed out that no one has ever flown a seagull like a kite. It was a one in a million experience. And with that Erik smiled. Maybe he didnt catch what he had wanted but he would remember that seagull for the rest of his life. And that seagull was happy Erik had decided to cast in that spot.
When Jesus was here on earth looking for disciples he wondered along the water and called out to Peter and Andrew, James and John who were out in their boats fishing: Come follow me, and I will make you fishers of men. Mathew 4:19 Immediately all followed, maybe they didnt know exactly what fishers of men meant? What would they be catching? But they got up and trusted in Jesus. And as they followed Jesus many of the goals the disciples had for Him and the people they wanted to share the message with changed drastically.
Erik was out along the water fishing, hoping for that big catch and in the end he realized that more than one thing was interested in that bait at the end of his rod. He has also come to realize that it is the same in being a disciple and sharing God with others.
Most people may feel like sharing their values and beliefs is difficult because no one seems to listen or respond. They sit at the edge of the river and cast and reel for a long time and soon lose hope. Soon God calls them and they get up and, they do not have to know why. Then they see what they have been hoping for. That fish, that one person that they have been casting for. That "project", the one they will help prepare for heaven. They throw out their line, eyes directed at the "fish", and no sooner does the bait get close to the target, a seagull swoops down and grabs it in its beak.
That person that cast the line gets discouraged, but they fail to realize that even though they had not caught that fish, they had shared something wonderful with that seagull. And as that seagull that caught the message sits and digests it, they may realize the good news God has for them.
Then, that person who cast the line realizes, maybe it wasnt that fish God was calling them for, maybe it was that seagull.
By: Sara Sue Renee
I would have to say that out of all the seasons in New England summer and fall are my favorite. The reason being, I am able to be at the beach, or there are no bugs and I can ride horses without being miserable. But seeing as it is almost summertime, this is the season I am going to pull the weekly devotional from.
Summer is a time where we can choose from a variety of activities whether it be swimming, working, surfing, horseback riding, hiking etc. My personal favorite activity is being on the beach. I love the waves and the wind and the salt. I have always gotten very excited for summer ever since I was a child and I still do.
This one particular summer, my family was just chillin at home but every Saturday we would either go on a hike or to the ocean. This particular Saturday it was the ocean. I could barely sit still in the car as we drove up to Maine. Erik and I had crammed the car full of beach stuff. We had stuff for crab catching, boogie boards, a skim board, towels chairs, the works. Oh, and Erik and my dad had also brought their ocean fishing rod.
It was a goal of theirs to catch a Striper fish. Thats a fish about the size of an adults forearm or bigger. I wasnt into fishing, but I was into catching crabs. Maybe its the instant gratification thing for me. Crabs are pretty dumb, and all I had to do was mash up some Mackerel, put it in a net and lower the net down from the bridge and wait maybe ten seconds or so to pull about 5 crabs out of the water. Waiting for hours to catch a huge fish just wasnt for me.
We got to the beach and Erik and I grabbed our boards and ran to the ocean. Its still our favorite and first thing we do now. Anyhow, we stayed in there until our bodies had turned blue, then it was time to warm up in the sun and catch fish, crabs, whatever came our way. Erik was determined that this was the day he was going to catch a Striper.
The place where we would go was just over the sand dunes at the mouth of the river that emptied into the ocean. I sat on the bridge going over the river with my net, and Erik walked a ways down the river, hoping to find that one lucky spot. I watched Erik as I absent-mindedly pulled my net out of the water (Very carefully so no crabs would let go.) and emptied the crabs into a pail sitting next to me.
Erik threw his first cast.
His second cast.... his third...fourth.... I was becoming hypnotized just watching his continuing casting motions that came one right after the other.
His bait was the head of the Mackerel fish we had bought. He used it like a lure casting out and reeling in. Over and over again. Fishing can be sooooo monotonous...
After a half hour of watching him and sitting in the warm sun I started to daydream. I was well off in another world when all of the sudden I felt a sharp pull at my net. Looking down to see what had pulled the net so hard I noticed the BIGGEST Striper fish hiding under the bridge. It swam towards my little net and pulled at it again. It was going after the fish that I was using to catch crabs. My mouth dropped open and I looked up the river only to see my discouraged brother way off in the distance. Casting and reeling. Casting and reeling.
I wondered if I should shout to him. Would he make it in time? Would I scare the fish away? In the end I decided to yell for him. I knew hed be upset if I didnt and with that I shouted for Erik and told him to hurry to the bridge.
It took Erik a couple of minuets to reach the bridge because he had to climb over many rocks. While he was climbing I kept my net full of mashed fish as still as the current would let me, to keep the Striper interested, and not attract other little kids and their nets to the fish.
Erik was nearing the side of the bridge and while he was still on the bank he looked over and noticed what I had called him for. He stopped dead in his tracks. I knew he was thinking, This is it! This is my day!! He started to double check his bait and line and got ready to cast. Just as he did a little kid on the bridge noticed the fish and yelled out to his friends. All the kids swarmed around me, I became busy telling them not to throw their nets down and motioned for Erik to move along and just cast his rod.
The next moments were pretty chaotic. The kids on the bridge were shouting and close to running in the river to catch the fish with their hands. The seagulls had come because all of the kids had brought up their nets full of meat and left them sitting on the bridge. I was keeping them (the kids and seagulls) back. I wanted to set Erik up for success. Erik finally got it together and cast out his bait and just as the bait was about to hit the water, a seagull swooped down and caught the lure with his beak.
The fish finally noticed all the chaos and started to jet down the river, out towards the ocean. Meanwhile Erik was left reeling in a seagull that by all means possible was not going to let Erik have his bait back. The seagull flew higher and higher. Eriks line was getting longer and longer. Erik was reeling and reeling and the seagull was pulling back.
One adult walked by and commented on what a cool kite Erik had and all the kids on the bridge started to laugh. Erik played tug o war with this seagull for a good minute or so and finally the line snapped and the seagull flew off with its prize.
Erik trudged up the bridge and sat beside me. He was never going to catch a Striper. I told him not to be discouraged. I pointed out that no one has ever flown a seagull like a kite. It was a one in a million experience. And with that Erik smiled. Maybe he didnt catch what he had wanted but he would remember that seagull for the rest of his life. And that seagull was happy Erik had decided to cast in that spot.
When Jesus was here on earth looking for disciples he wondered along the water and called out to Peter and Andrew, James and John who were out in their boats fishing: Come follow me, and I will make you fishers of men. Mathew 4:19 Immediately all followed, maybe they didnt know exactly what fishers of men meant? What would they be catching? But they got up and trusted in Jesus. And as they followed Jesus many of the goals the disciples had for Him and the people they wanted to share the message with changed drastically.
Erik was out along the water fishing, hoping for that big catch and in the end he realized that more than one thing was interested in that bait at the end of his rod. He has also come to realize that it is the same in being a disciple and sharing God with others.
Most people may feel like sharing their values and beliefs is difficult because no one seems to listen or respond. They sit at the edge of the river and cast and reel for a long time and soon lose hope. Soon God calls them and they get up and, they do not have to know why. Then they see what they have been hoping for. That fish, that one person that they have been casting for. That "project", the one they will help prepare for heaven. They throw out their line, eyes directed at the "fish", and no sooner does the bait get close to the target, a seagull swoops down and grabs it in its beak.
That person that cast the line gets discouraged, but they fail to realize that even though they had not caught that fish, they had shared something wonderful with that seagull. And as that seagull that caught the message sits and digests it, they may realize the good news God has for them.
Then, that person who cast the line realizes, maybe it wasnt that fish God was calling them for, maybe it was that seagull.
By: Sara Sue Renee
Talking to the Past...
The phone rang this morning. I always make it a habit to look at the caller id. But this time I forgot and just picked up. On the line was my great uncle. He usually never calls, actually really never calls. The last time I talked to him was my senior year of high school.
He started asking me about how I was doing, and where I was in life. As I replied he would tell me about his. The glory days in high school. About him and his best friend Zip. Zip was the president of his class. My great uncle was his best friend, the two of them had fun together, got in trouble together. You know, they did what all best friends do.
My uncle was the class valid Victorian. There is still a picture of him at the high school he went to. At least last time I went it was there. He was really handsome, and very much a ladies man. lol. After he graduated from South Lancaster Academy he joined the army and fought in WWII. He's told me the stories a million times. I always love listening, even if the same story was told ten minuets earlier.
My great uncle was one of my favorite family members. I remember he bought me a watch. It had a yellow wrist band and a picture of a panda bear jumping rope. I still have it actually. I treasured that watch as a child.
Of coarse as a child there is always a side to the story one doesn't know. My great uncle was a drinker in high school. As he grew up his habit became worse. Such a smart smart man, and such a horrible demise. Alcohol ruined his life. He had so much potential, and lost all his motivation to the flask. But i don't remember the problems his drinking caused him.
Then one day my grandma got sick. She had cancer and died when I was about four. Not a lot of people remember that far back in their life time, but I do. I remember sitting on her bed, letting her tell me stories while my mom took care of her. My grandma was a true beauty. And my great uncle was her brother. When she died my uncle was devastated, and that was it. I never saw him again.
After she died my great uncle went away. I never saw him again after that. But every couple of years he rings our phone and I at least get to know he's still alive. I so wish I could be four again, and open that watch he bought me. I wish that I had a normal relationship with him so that instead of talking about the past we could talk about the future. But the past is where he seems to live and when he calls it is only the past I can talk to. I so wish the past was different, and he didn't have a drinking problem and he hadn't moved away. But time passes on and every time I talk to my uncle I learn to treasure what you have for the moment you have it. Because someday it can all be gone forever.
He started asking me about how I was doing, and where I was in life. As I replied he would tell me about his. The glory days in high school. About him and his best friend Zip. Zip was the president of his class. My great uncle was his best friend, the two of them had fun together, got in trouble together. You know, they did what all best friends do.
My uncle was the class valid Victorian. There is still a picture of him at the high school he went to. At least last time I went it was there. He was really handsome, and very much a ladies man. lol. After he graduated from South Lancaster Academy he joined the army and fought in WWII. He's told me the stories a million times. I always love listening, even if the same story was told ten minuets earlier.
My great uncle was one of my favorite family members. I remember he bought me a watch. It had a yellow wrist band and a picture of a panda bear jumping rope. I still have it actually. I treasured that watch as a child.
Of coarse as a child there is always a side to the story one doesn't know. My great uncle was a drinker in high school. As he grew up his habit became worse. Such a smart smart man, and such a horrible demise. Alcohol ruined his life. He had so much potential, and lost all his motivation to the flask. But i don't remember the problems his drinking caused him.
Then one day my grandma got sick. She had cancer and died when I was about four. Not a lot of people remember that far back in their life time, but I do. I remember sitting on her bed, letting her tell me stories while my mom took care of her. My grandma was a true beauty. And my great uncle was her brother. When she died my uncle was devastated, and that was it. I never saw him again.
After she died my great uncle went away. I never saw him again after that. But every couple of years he rings our phone and I at least get to know he's still alive. I so wish I could be four again, and open that watch he bought me. I wish that I had a normal relationship with him so that instead of talking about the past we could talk about the future. But the past is where he seems to live and when he calls it is only the past I can talk to. I so wish the past was different, and he didn't have a drinking problem and he hadn't moved away. But time passes on and every time I talk to my uncle I learn to treasure what you have for the moment you have it. Because someday it can all be gone forever.
Rain
Childhood Rain...
Swift grey motion, coming above.
Look up, feel exilerating joy.
Standing tall, arms stretched towards the sky.
Rain...Welcome.
Hot humidity disappears as cool beads fall.
Splash down on my face.
Beat down on my skin.
Close my eyes and smile.
Drops run down every line of my face.
Every dimple in my smile.
Clothes cling to my skin.
Hair grabs at my face.
I still stand there.
Arms outstretched.
Baseball bat at my feet.
Mud around my shoes.
Game forgotten.
Rain.
Welcome.
By: Sara Sue Renee
Swift grey motion, coming above.
Look up, feel exilerating joy.
Standing tall, arms stretched towards the sky.
Rain...Welcome.
Hot humidity disappears as cool beads fall.
Splash down on my face.
Beat down on my skin.
Close my eyes and smile.
Drops run down every line of my face.
Every dimple in my smile.
Clothes cling to my skin.
Hair grabs at my face.
I still stand there.
Arms outstretched.
Baseball bat at my feet.
Mud around my shoes.
Game forgotten.
Rain.
Welcome.
By: Sara Sue Renee
To Laugh is to Live with Meaning..
To laugh is to live with meaning...
Laughter, I thrive on it.
The joy and squint in my eyes,
only made by my smile.
Face red, cheeks so sore.
Not being able to breathe!
Then having the air rush into your lungs...
Only to lose it again with a pure soulful rush of dizzy joy!
To laugh is to live with meaning...
By: Sara Sue Renee
Laughter, I thrive on it.
The joy and squint in my eyes,
only made by my smile.
Face red, cheeks so sore.
Not being able to breathe!
Then having the air rush into your lungs...
Only to lose it again with a pure soulful rush of dizzy joy!
To laugh is to live with meaning...
By: Sara Sue Renee
Fall in NE
A Season...My Season...Until winter that is...
It's finally arrived, my favorite season of the year. The bugs are slowly starting to disappear, as are the summer birds, but this morning there were seven wild turkeys in my neighbors yard. The air has a different texture now. If one could actually see air I think that in the fall it would look like a neatly folded piece of the whitest paper. One clean fold, four sharp edges.
Of coarse who can forget about the smell of the apple trees. The fragrance spreads all over the neighborhood as the wind blows wrestling the leaves that have already passed off of their limbs. The trees have started to turn and when I drive up a certain hill near my house, or down a street where the trees have been allowed to form a tunnel over it, they look as though they have burst into a fire! So many blindly bright colors and so many different hues, no one could ever name all the shades I see. In moments like this I think of my grandma who always describe colors like "orange..ish" or "red…ish" or "yellow…ish". My grandpa always used to say to her "Colors like that DON'T exist!" and I would smile because I knew better. He just had to take a closer look at the leaves.
When I get home from school I usually go and try to take a few moments for myself by just laying down in the thick bed of grass at the front of my house. I take shelter from the wind behind Bella my dog that lies down next to me. I close my eyes and take in all the other things fall has to offer to my senses. I feel a bug crawling over my hand and in the distance I hear the beating of hooves on the pavement and I know that it's my neighbors taking the opportunity to ride. Their horses yell a greeting to mine as they trot by and mine yell back. I know Rosie and Rocky would love to go…But I have so much homework to do and can't afford the couple of hours riding would take. "This weekend though." I promise them in my thoughts.
Fall is such a happy season. Children look forward to being something different for one night in exchange for a months worth of candies. Families start planning for thanksgiving. My mom starts canning peaches, even though we are not farmers like our great grandparents were she thinks it's good to keep the tradition alive. If the grocery stores ran out of food around winter or if just out of the blue we got ten feet of snow in one night…we'd be ready I just get that feeling when I walk down to the basement and see all the stored fruit and vegetables. Not only do we have canned peaches but also we have marinated beans and TONS of applesauce. But I hope ten feet of snow is impossible for now, because I have no idea what would happen with the horses.
Even though around me the trees are cutting their leaves off of their ration of food, and all the animals are disappearing into their burrows more and more I still am never depressed about this season. I think fall is one of the best times for reflection, a time to say goodbye to the old and get ready to cocoon into our warm houses for the winter to emerge new and better people in the spring.
Here's to fall…
It's finally arrived, my favorite season of the year. The bugs are slowly starting to disappear, as are the summer birds, but this morning there were seven wild turkeys in my neighbors yard. The air has a different texture now. If one could actually see air I think that in the fall it would look like a neatly folded piece of the whitest paper. One clean fold, four sharp edges.
Of coarse who can forget about the smell of the apple trees. The fragrance spreads all over the neighborhood as the wind blows wrestling the leaves that have already passed off of their limbs. The trees have started to turn and when I drive up a certain hill near my house, or down a street where the trees have been allowed to form a tunnel over it, they look as though they have burst into a fire! So many blindly bright colors and so many different hues, no one could ever name all the shades I see. In moments like this I think of my grandma who always describe colors like "orange..ish" or "red…ish" or "yellow…ish". My grandpa always used to say to her "Colors like that DON'T exist!" and I would smile because I knew better. He just had to take a closer look at the leaves.
When I get home from school I usually go and try to take a few moments for myself by just laying down in the thick bed of grass at the front of my house. I take shelter from the wind behind Bella my dog that lies down next to me. I close my eyes and take in all the other things fall has to offer to my senses. I feel a bug crawling over my hand and in the distance I hear the beating of hooves on the pavement and I know that it's my neighbors taking the opportunity to ride. Their horses yell a greeting to mine as they trot by and mine yell back. I know Rosie and Rocky would love to go…But I have so much homework to do and can't afford the couple of hours riding would take. "This weekend though." I promise them in my thoughts.
Fall is such a happy season. Children look forward to being something different for one night in exchange for a months worth of candies. Families start planning for thanksgiving. My mom starts canning peaches, even though we are not farmers like our great grandparents were she thinks it's good to keep the tradition alive. If the grocery stores ran out of food around winter or if just out of the blue we got ten feet of snow in one night…we'd be ready I just get that feeling when I walk down to the basement and see all the stored fruit and vegetables. Not only do we have canned peaches but also we have marinated beans and TONS of applesauce. But I hope ten feet of snow is impossible for now, because I have no idea what would happen with the horses.
Even though around me the trees are cutting their leaves off of their ration of food, and all the animals are disappearing into their burrows more and more I still am never depressed about this season. I think fall is one of the best times for reflection, a time to say goodbye to the old and get ready to cocoon into our warm houses for the winter to emerge new and better people in the spring.
Here's to fall…
What is selfless?
Selfless. What is selfless? When I was younger I used to go and visit my grandparents and great grandparents for the weekend while my mom and dad took a little break from the world. Of coarse, being at my grandparents house was my break from the world. No school or homework. Just chocolate milk and cuddles. I remember one particular day I was sitting in the kitchen watching my grandma make dinner. The kitchen was small with a hard wood floor that kinda slanted down hill. This meant that the only chair worth sitting in had wheels! So I would sit on the wheeled chair and pull myself up to one end of the kitchen and then lift my feet and roll aaaaaaaaaallllllllllllll the way to the other end. While I was rolling in the chair my grandma would take an occasional moment to talk with me and teach me her "life lessons" as she called them.
This day she had decided she was going to teach me about being selfless. As she talked about giving to others and blah blah blah…(Because I wasn't listening.) I held my chair still and stared at the window above the sink. There my grandma had hung glass tear drops and when the sun was at just the right angle the tear drops would scatter rainbows across the wood floor. I thought they were beautiful, and she did too. Then my grandma went back to stirring whatever it was and I continued to roll my chair.
I wished I had listened to what she had said about being selfless. Because maybe if I had, I wouldn't have had such a difficult time achieving that quality… But instead of watching and listening and learning I grew frustrated with her. All the time she spent in the nursing home taking care of all the "old people" as Erik and I put it those days. And not even that! She would go upstairs and take care of her bosses cats and clean her bosses house and do her bosses laundry. I always felt that my grandma was far from selfless she let herself be a housemaid. And I hated that.
The more I saw how much she gave, the more I tried to take for myself. I became greedy, and wouldn't share. I wouldn't give people I didn't like the time of day. But it was worse than that. I would lie and hurt. I remember notes that my grandma would leave me when she came to visit… Begging me to tell the truth and see my mistakes. But I wouldn't listen. Sure when I got them I cried, and apologized. But the tears were crocodile tears. Put on for show. "Be selfless!" She would plead. "Sara, you are capable. I know it's in you!"
Then, she got cancer. It happened so fast. One day I got home from school and found my mom lying on her bedroom floor crying, and she told me. I didn't know what to say. We went down to visit grandma all the time. She mostly slept. I would sit for hours in a stool and sing her favorite hymes. I would tell her stories, and I would feed her at meal times. When it was time for us to sleep I would curl up next to her and cry. She would cry too. Our tears would blend in a river of sorrow. For her it was because I hadn't changed yet. For me it was because I thought without her I'd never change…
My grandma died only 6 months after she was diagnosed. The cancer didn't even give her enough time to lose her hair from the chemo. I remember being in the house after her service. I sat in the kitchen. And even though I was 16 years old I still sat in the rolling chair. Bringing myself up to one end and letting myself roll back to the other. And I looked at the floor. The tears on the window scattered their rainbows. No matter what they would always show their colors and always remind me of my grandma. I got off my chair and curled up on the floor in the midst of the rainbows and cried. I stayed there for an hour remembering all the lessons my grandma had tried to teach me.
I've changed a lot since then. Now my grandpa is sick. I go to his house and sit with him for hours. I don't have to talk; he just likes someone to be there. I get a bucket of water so he can soak his feet. I wash and dry them and then I give him a foot rub. His feet, well… They are not the most appealing to touch. But I love my grandpa and I would do anything to make him feel at least a little better. And sometimes at certain parts of the day I look up at one of his windows. On it is a little teardrop and it scatters rainbows across his carpeted floor.
And while I watch the rainbow I realize that I have figured out what selfless is. I never saw how grandma's boss couldn't take care of herself. I failed to notice how lonely the people in the nursing home really were. And I had been selfish to not realize, but in the end being selfless took over. I was selfless while singing to my grandma for hours on end. I am still selfless today by taking care of my grandpa. I am capable of giving my all to help anyone in need, even if I don't personally know them. And I would never expect anything in return. I don't lie, because it destroys relationships. I don't hurt others because I'm just not capable of that anymore. And I'm happy I've lost that part of me.
When I go to church people come up to me that knew my grandma. And they will say "Sara, you look just like she did years ago!" or they will tell my mom, "Sara's not much like you or her dad…She reminds me of her grandmother." I am so honored to walk in my grandma's footsteps. She is one of the most amazing women I will have ever known. Not a housemaid… A selfless, loving, wonderful woman. The person God wanted her to be. And if I can be like her, as selfless as she was, I know it will bring me one step closer to knowing Jesus.
This day she had decided she was going to teach me about being selfless. As she talked about giving to others and blah blah blah…(Because I wasn't listening.) I held my chair still and stared at the window above the sink. There my grandma had hung glass tear drops and when the sun was at just the right angle the tear drops would scatter rainbows across the wood floor. I thought they were beautiful, and she did too. Then my grandma went back to stirring whatever it was and I continued to roll my chair.
I wished I had listened to what she had said about being selfless. Because maybe if I had, I wouldn't have had such a difficult time achieving that quality… But instead of watching and listening and learning I grew frustrated with her. All the time she spent in the nursing home taking care of all the "old people" as Erik and I put it those days. And not even that! She would go upstairs and take care of her bosses cats and clean her bosses house and do her bosses laundry. I always felt that my grandma was far from selfless she let herself be a housemaid. And I hated that.
The more I saw how much she gave, the more I tried to take for myself. I became greedy, and wouldn't share. I wouldn't give people I didn't like the time of day. But it was worse than that. I would lie and hurt. I remember notes that my grandma would leave me when she came to visit… Begging me to tell the truth and see my mistakes. But I wouldn't listen. Sure when I got them I cried, and apologized. But the tears were crocodile tears. Put on for show. "Be selfless!" She would plead. "Sara, you are capable. I know it's in you!"
Then, she got cancer. It happened so fast. One day I got home from school and found my mom lying on her bedroom floor crying, and she told me. I didn't know what to say. We went down to visit grandma all the time. She mostly slept. I would sit for hours in a stool and sing her favorite hymes. I would tell her stories, and I would feed her at meal times. When it was time for us to sleep I would curl up next to her and cry. She would cry too. Our tears would blend in a river of sorrow. For her it was because I hadn't changed yet. For me it was because I thought without her I'd never change…
My grandma died only 6 months after she was diagnosed. The cancer didn't even give her enough time to lose her hair from the chemo. I remember being in the house after her service. I sat in the kitchen. And even though I was 16 years old I still sat in the rolling chair. Bringing myself up to one end and letting myself roll back to the other. And I looked at the floor. The tears on the window scattered their rainbows. No matter what they would always show their colors and always remind me of my grandma. I got off my chair and curled up on the floor in the midst of the rainbows and cried. I stayed there for an hour remembering all the lessons my grandma had tried to teach me.
I've changed a lot since then. Now my grandpa is sick. I go to his house and sit with him for hours. I don't have to talk; he just likes someone to be there. I get a bucket of water so he can soak his feet. I wash and dry them and then I give him a foot rub. His feet, well… They are not the most appealing to touch. But I love my grandpa and I would do anything to make him feel at least a little better. And sometimes at certain parts of the day I look up at one of his windows. On it is a little teardrop and it scatters rainbows across his carpeted floor.
And while I watch the rainbow I realize that I have figured out what selfless is. I never saw how grandma's boss couldn't take care of herself. I failed to notice how lonely the people in the nursing home really were. And I had been selfish to not realize, but in the end being selfless took over. I was selfless while singing to my grandma for hours on end. I am still selfless today by taking care of my grandpa. I am capable of giving my all to help anyone in need, even if I don't personally know them. And I would never expect anything in return. I don't lie, because it destroys relationships. I don't hurt others because I'm just not capable of that anymore. And I'm happy I've lost that part of me.
When I go to church people come up to me that knew my grandma. And they will say "Sara, you look just like she did years ago!" or they will tell my mom, "Sara's not much like you or her dad…She reminds me of her grandmother." I am so honored to walk in my grandma's footsteps. She is one of the most amazing women I will have ever known. Not a housemaid… A selfless, loving, wonderful woman. The person God wanted her to be. And if I can be like her, as selfless as she was, I know it will bring me one step closer to knowing Jesus.
My first fall off a horse..
One of my horse experiences...In case you all thought I was the perfect rider...lol
Horseback Riding: A relationship among a horse and human where through giving, receiving, and understanding riding is achieved, fears are evaporated, and the world around the two of you becomes non existent. A relationship worthy of demonstrating and giving the human race a small idea as to the kind of relationship Jesus wants to have with all of us.
That is my definition at least...
I don't want to say a long time ago, because that makes me sound old and I'm not, but some time ago when I was 11 or 12 I started learning how to canter on a horse. For those of you who don't know what a canter is, think of riding a merry-go-round horse and you'll get the general idea. Only, it was much scarier on the real thing. I was on this averaged size horse, but to me she was huge and a canter was fast. Every time I asked her to go she would take off so quick it felt as though I didnt even have time to breath.
My lanky body would be shifting around on this horse as stiff as an iron post and my face would turn two shades whiter than it already is. My riding instructor at the time was having difficulties getting me to calm down. I am a cautious person, and don't really do things I think are crazy or stupid...for the most part. Its really left up to my judgment and at that particular time...cantering...Well it was stupid. I was perfectly happy at the level I was at and didn't want to move any further. Why should I? But my instructor thought otherwise and sent me off into a canter one more time before my lesson ended and that's when it happened.
My horse lurched into her three beat pace and as she did both of my legs wrapped around either side of her, tight! She took that as a signal to go faster and with her ears pinned forward she started to run. I panicked, and as I was racing around the ring on this horse I started to lose balance and leaned towards the wall. I looked to where I was about to fall and saw the mirrors lined up around the rail. I knew if I fell to that side I would fall into the mirrors so I took a deep breath and pushed myself off towards the middle of the ring and landed in the cold dirt with a thud.
I didn..t get up...my riding instructor ran over to where I was standing and started tapping me hard and feeling a sharp pain in my right shoulder I came to and demanded she stop hitting me. After she helped me up I walked straight over to where my horse was standing and demanded to try again. My instructor wouldn..t let me, but she did at least let my get on again and walk around.
After, my parents took me to the hospital, and there, I received a sling, and some very pretty pictures of a fractured shoulder. Yea. What a souvenir.
It took four weeks for the bone to heal, but it took me one year to gain enough courage to ride a horse again. I was scared of them, but still determined to someday ride, and canter without falling off. My mothers friend let me take care of one of her horses. My determination kept me at the barn, maybe not riding horses but near horses. This particular horse was named Buddy, and that he was to me.
Slowly I started to gain confidence in my skills through working with Buddy. He was patient while I dealt with my frustration. He was kind when I was mean. And he was gentle when I was scared. Buddy helped me deal with my lack of confidence by letting me rely on him, and before I knew I was ready, I was on his back riding again...And soon after I started to ride Buddy, I cantered. Without any saddle, and it did feel just like a merry go round.
A year after my shoulder, all my fears forgotten, and all because I had a relationship with an animal who seemed to understand my every fear and thought. An animal that wanted to have a connection so badly that he put up with my idiosyncrasies, fears, and anger. And when I think about this incident today I can see that it is not just about me regaining my confidence around horses, or having a great relationship with Buddy.
It was God, showing me that no matter what my situation is, or what I am feeling at the time He is always by my side. He helps me be confident, when I am angry He is calm, He is kind when I am mean, and He is so gentle when I am scared, and God..s patients towards me is never ending. He sacrificed it all. I thank Him for that. And my only hope is I can help others realize the illustrations of His love for us and the love that we should show through ourselves, that He gives us through animals. Maybe by doing this, as small as I am in the scheme of things, I can be a tool for a difference. And maybe in a small way, because I know I could never give enough and He doesn't expect me to, I can show Him my love and gratefulness for all He has done and is doing for me.
..The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law (Galatians 5:22)..
Horseback Riding: A relationship among a horse and human where through giving, receiving, and understanding riding is achieved, fears are evaporated, and the world around the two of you becomes non existent. A relationship worthy of demonstrating and giving the human race a small idea as to the kind of relationship Jesus wants to have with all of us.
That is my definition at least...
I don't want to say a long time ago, because that makes me sound old and I'm not, but some time ago when I was 11 or 12 I started learning how to canter on a horse. For those of you who don't know what a canter is, think of riding a merry-go-round horse and you'll get the general idea. Only, it was much scarier on the real thing. I was on this averaged size horse, but to me she was huge and a canter was fast. Every time I asked her to go she would take off so quick it felt as though I didnt even have time to breath.
My lanky body would be shifting around on this horse as stiff as an iron post and my face would turn two shades whiter than it already is. My riding instructor at the time was having difficulties getting me to calm down. I am a cautious person, and don't really do things I think are crazy or stupid...for the most part. Its really left up to my judgment and at that particular time...cantering...Well it was stupid. I was perfectly happy at the level I was at and didn't want to move any further. Why should I? But my instructor thought otherwise and sent me off into a canter one more time before my lesson ended and that's when it happened.
My horse lurched into her three beat pace and as she did both of my legs wrapped around either side of her, tight! She took that as a signal to go faster and with her ears pinned forward she started to run. I panicked, and as I was racing around the ring on this horse I started to lose balance and leaned towards the wall. I looked to where I was about to fall and saw the mirrors lined up around the rail. I knew if I fell to that side I would fall into the mirrors so I took a deep breath and pushed myself off towards the middle of the ring and landed in the cold dirt with a thud.
I didn..t get up...my riding instructor ran over to where I was standing and started tapping me hard and feeling a sharp pain in my right shoulder I came to and demanded she stop hitting me. After she helped me up I walked straight over to where my horse was standing and demanded to try again. My instructor wouldn..t let me, but she did at least let my get on again and walk around.
After, my parents took me to the hospital, and there, I received a sling, and some very pretty pictures of a fractured shoulder. Yea. What a souvenir.
It took four weeks for the bone to heal, but it took me one year to gain enough courage to ride a horse again. I was scared of them, but still determined to someday ride, and canter without falling off. My mothers friend let me take care of one of her horses. My determination kept me at the barn, maybe not riding horses but near horses. This particular horse was named Buddy, and that he was to me.
Slowly I started to gain confidence in my skills through working with Buddy. He was patient while I dealt with my frustration. He was kind when I was mean. And he was gentle when I was scared. Buddy helped me deal with my lack of confidence by letting me rely on him, and before I knew I was ready, I was on his back riding again...And soon after I started to ride Buddy, I cantered. Without any saddle, and it did feel just like a merry go round.
A year after my shoulder, all my fears forgotten, and all because I had a relationship with an animal who seemed to understand my every fear and thought. An animal that wanted to have a connection so badly that he put up with my idiosyncrasies, fears, and anger. And when I think about this incident today I can see that it is not just about me regaining my confidence around horses, or having a great relationship with Buddy.
It was God, showing me that no matter what my situation is, or what I am feeling at the time He is always by my side. He helps me be confident, when I am angry He is calm, He is kind when I am mean, and He is so gentle when I am scared, and God..s patients towards me is never ending. He sacrificed it all. I thank Him for that. And my only hope is I can help others realize the illustrations of His love for us and the love that we should show through ourselves, that He gives us through animals. Maybe by doing this, as small as I am in the scheme of things, I can be a tool for a difference. And maybe in a small way, because I know I could never give enough and He doesn't expect me to, I can show Him my love and gratefulness for all He has done and is doing for me.
..The fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law (Galatians 5:22)..
The Lamp: My grandpa's short story..
The Lamp
A certain homeowner had a lamp. It was a nice lamp, which he had set up so it would shine over his lawn and drive. It lit this area for several years, providing light and guidance to all who came his way.
Then one day, as the lamp was getting old and the light dull, the homeowner decided to get rid of it. He loaded it into his car and took it to the local landfill. As he was unloading the lamp another neighbor came by and asked if the lamp was to be junked. The first homeowner stated that he was indeed throwing the lamp away.
At this point the neighbor saw how he might be able to use it so he picked it up and took it home. He spent many hours repairing the lamp and shining the reflector. He then set it up where it would give light to those who would pass by.
He hoped it would keep someone from stumbling or falling in the dark. It worked great for many years and he kept taking care of the lamp to keep it polished and working properly.
Then one day the original homeowner came riding by. He noticed the antique lamp and saw how the new owner had repaired it. He admired how it served its purpose so well. It was then he realized that just because something is old and not working the way it used too, doesn't mean it must be discarded.
Whether we are old or young each of us has a unique light to shine. It is up to us to encourage each other to keep our lights bright, to polish the light that is growing dim by offering encouragement or saying a kind word, because we never know whom we might be guiding.
Just like that old antique lamp
Written by: Alfred Keith
Adapted by: Sara Davitt
A certain homeowner had a lamp. It was a nice lamp, which he had set up so it would shine over his lawn and drive. It lit this area for several years, providing light and guidance to all who came his way.
Then one day, as the lamp was getting old and the light dull, the homeowner decided to get rid of it. He loaded it into his car and took it to the local landfill. As he was unloading the lamp another neighbor came by and asked if the lamp was to be junked. The first homeowner stated that he was indeed throwing the lamp away.
At this point the neighbor saw how he might be able to use it so he picked it up and took it home. He spent many hours repairing the lamp and shining the reflector. He then set it up where it would give light to those who would pass by.
He hoped it would keep someone from stumbling or falling in the dark. It worked great for many years and he kept taking care of the lamp to keep it polished and working properly.
Then one day the original homeowner came riding by. He noticed the antique lamp and saw how the new owner had repaired it. He admired how it served its purpose so well. It was then he realized that just because something is old and not working the way it used too, doesn't mean it must be discarded.
Whether we are old or young each of us has a unique light to shine. It is up to us to encourage each other to keep our lights bright, to polish the light that is growing dim by offering encouragement or saying a kind word, because we never know whom we might be guiding.
Just like that old antique lamp
Written by: Alfred Keith
Adapted by: Sara Davitt
Updated list of things to do in my lifetime.
Sara's list of things to do in her lifetime updated version!!!! =)
Sara's List of thing to do in her lifetime!!
So I've done some of this (hence the check!) and I plan to do the rest as well as add more. Any fun ideas??? Let me know!
1. Feel comfertable in a 2 piece!(I am checking this one too!!)
2. Learn Italian
3. Go to Europe (CHECK CHECK AND CHECK!!!)
4. Go to Africa
5. Own a dog named Hazel
6. Plant a garden and actually keep the plants alive.
7. Live by the beach
8. Fall in True Love
9. Change someone's life
10. Give a 100 dollars to a complete stranger.
11. Stop being afraid of hieghts.
12. Sail on a boat bigger than my little sunfish. (check!)
13. Go tidepooling once a week for a month.
14. Swim with my horse.(check!)
15. Try every fruit there is! (That humans can eat)
16. Order a different entre than Pad Thai.(check!)
17. Sit through an opera with out falling asleep.
18. Learn how to surf (or at least gain a concept) !!Currently doing!
19. Find my inner "-ness"(check!) (I think I'll always be finding a new level of -ness)
20. Go on the super man at six flags (OMGoodness!! Abdiel, you helped me do this one. I forgot I had written it!)
21. Climb Mt. Washington.(check!)
22. Hike down the Grand Canyon
23. Go skinny dipping.(check!)
24. Learn to enjoy being alone.
25. Learn how to cook
26. Be a great cook
27. Get my doctorate
28. Write a book
29. Learn how to dive
30. Minor in religion
31. Live in Switzerland for a bit
32. Learn German
33. Learn the guitar
34. Get back into piano
35. Be more giving
36. Jump bareback
37. Climb a tree with no branches
38. Go on a week canoe trip
39. Burp in a crowded room (don't ask me why...)
40. Buy my own little car (DONE!)
41. Jump on a wakeboard
42. Ride an elephant
43. Swim with dolphins
44. See the sunrise at Machu Pichu
45. Hike the great wall of China
46. Learn Spanish
47. Ride a horse on the beach
48. Pet a whale
49. See a Lion, in the wild of coarse!
50. Take Andre to do something great.
51. Eat spaghetti in Italy
Sara's List of thing to do in her lifetime!!
So I've done some of this (hence the check!) and I plan to do the rest as well as add more. Any fun ideas??? Let me know!
1. Feel comfertable in a 2 piece!(I am checking this one too!!)
2. Learn Italian
3. Go to Europe (CHECK CHECK AND CHECK!!!)
4. Go to Africa
5. Own a dog named Hazel
6. Plant a garden and actually keep the plants alive.
7. Live by the beach
8. Fall in True Love
9. Change someone's life
10. Give a 100 dollars to a complete stranger.
11. Stop being afraid of hieghts.
12. Sail on a boat bigger than my little sunfish. (check!)
13. Go tidepooling once a week for a month.
14. Swim with my horse.(check!)
15. Try every fruit there is! (That humans can eat)
16. Order a different entre than Pad Thai.(check!)
17. Sit through an opera with out falling asleep.
18. Learn how to surf (or at least gain a concept) !!Currently doing!
19. Find my inner "-ness"(check!) (I think I'll always be finding a new level of -ness)
20. Go on the super man at six flags (OMGoodness!! Abdiel, you helped me do this one. I forgot I had written it!)
21. Climb Mt. Washington.(check!)
22. Hike down the Grand Canyon
23. Go skinny dipping.(check!)
24. Learn to enjoy being alone.
25. Learn how to cook
26. Be a great cook
27. Get my doctorate
28. Write a book
29. Learn how to dive
30. Minor in religion
31. Live in Switzerland for a bit
32. Learn German
33. Learn the guitar
34. Get back into piano
35. Be more giving
36. Jump bareback
37. Climb a tree with no branches
38. Go on a week canoe trip
39. Burp in a crowded room (don't ask me why...)
40. Buy my own little car (DONE!)
41. Jump on a wakeboard
42. Ride an elephant
43. Swim with dolphins
44. See the sunrise at Machu Pichu
45. Hike the great wall of China
46. Learn Spanish
47. Ride a horse on the beach
48. Pet a whale
49. See a Lion, in the wild of coarse!
50. Take Andre to do something great.
51. Eat spaghetti in Italy
A poem I wrote years ago...
A Child's Song
His bright eyes looked up at me,
The hot air slowed his pace.
I to young to understand,
Why blood flowed down his face.
Trudged up hill to Calvary,
A cross forced on his back.
Sadly looked up to the sky,
And saw that it was black.
I wished to help my Jesus,
But I to small and weak,
Saw that I could not help him,
Fell on knees, began to weep.
Jesus stopped and looked at me,
Tears running down his face.
"Not leaving forever child,
I'm just saving sinful race."
I watched the soldiers nail him,
On those two dreaded planks.
They raised him up, "It is done!"
And his dear head went and sank.
Sara Sue Davitt
A Child's Song
His bright eyes looked up at me,
The hot air slowed his pace.
I to young to understand,
Why blood flowed down his face.
Trudged up hill to Calvary,
A cross forced on his back.
Sadly looked up to the sky,
And saw that it was black.
I wished to help my Jesus,
But I to small and weak,
Saw that I could not help him,
Fell on knees, began to weep.
Jesus stopped and looked at me,
Tears running down his face.
"Not leaving forever child,
I'm just saving sinful race."
I watched the soldiers nail him,
On those two dreaded planks.
They raised him up, "It is done!"
And his dear head went and sank.
Sara Sue Davitt
A Shared Short Story...
Laurel's comment which I will treasure!
One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made Woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime¦
An angel appeared and said, 'Why are you spending so much time on this one Project?' And the Lord answered, 'Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time, and a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart and she will do everything
with only two hands.'
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
'Only two hands!? No way! And that 's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish.'said the Angel,
'But I won't,' the Lord protested.
'I am close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days.'
The angel moved closer and touched the woman. 'But you have made her so soft, Lord.'
'She is soft,' the Lord agreed, 'but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.'
'Will she be able to think?', asked the angel.
The Lord replied,
'Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate.'
The angel, noticing something, reached out, touched the woman's cheek.
'Oops , it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one.'
'That's not a leak,' the Lord corrected, 'That's a tear!' 'What's the tear for?' the angel asked.
The Lord said, 'The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointmen t, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride' The angel was impressed.
'You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everyth ing!
Woman is truly amazing.'
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice. They don't take 'no' for an answer if there's a better solution
They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their
children excel; cheer when friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail to show how much they care.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
THERE IS ONLY ONE FLAW IN WOMEN:
THEY ARE NOT AWARE OF THEIR WORTH.
One Flaw In Women
By the time the Lord made Woman,
He was into his sixth day of working overtime¦
An angel appeared and said, 'Why are you spending so much time on this one Project?' And the Lord answered, 'Have you seen my spec sheet on her?
She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, able to run on diet coke and leftovers,
have a lap that can hold four children at one time, and a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart and she will do everything
with only two hands.'
The angel was astounded at the requirements.
'Only two hands!? No way! And that 's just on the standard model?
That's too much work for one day.
Wait until tomorrow to finish.'said the Angel,
'But I won't,' the Lord protested.
'I am close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can work 18 hour days.'
The angel moved closer and touched the woman. 'But you have made her so soft, Lord.'
'She is soft,' the Lord agreed, 'but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish.'
'Will she be able to think?', asked the angel.
The Lord replied,
'Not only will she be able to think,
she will be able to reason and negotiate.'
The angel, noticing something, reached out, touched the woman's cheek.
'Oops , it looks like you have a leak in this model. I told you that you were trying to put too much into this one.'
'That's not a leak,' the Lord corrected, 'That's a tear!' 'What's the tear for?' the angel asked.
The Lord said, 'The tear is her way of expressing her joy,
her sorrow, her pain, her disappointmen t, her love, her loneliness, her grief and her pride' The angel was impressed.
'You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everyth ing!
Woman is truly amazing.'
And she is!
Women have strengths that amaze men.
They bear hardships and they carry burdens, but they hold happiness, love and joy. They smile when they want to scream. They sing when they want to cry. They cry when they are happy
and laugh when they are nervous.
They fight for what they believe in.
They stand up to injustice. They don't take 'no' for an answer if there's a better solution
They go without so their family can have. They go to the doctor with a frightened friend.
They love unconditionally.
They cry when their
children excel; cheer when friends get awards. They are happy when they hear about a birth or a wedding.
Their hearts break when a friend dies.
They grieve at the loss of a family member, yet they are strong when they think there is no strength left.
They know that a hug and a kiss can heal a broken heart.
Women come in all shapes, sizes and colors. They'll drive, fly, walk, run or e-mail to show how much they care.
The heart of a woman is what makes the world keep turning.
They bring joy, hope and love. They have compassion and ideals. They give moral support to their family and friends. Women have vital things to say and everything to give.
THERE IS ONLY ONE FLAW IN WOMEN:
THEY ARE NOT AWARE OF THEIR WORTH.
Love is...
Love is....
I was doing devotions last night because I couldn't sleep, and I came to some cool realizations...simple ones..but sometimes we forget the simple things.
Love is interlinked with many things. Patience, kindness, trust...etc. When one chooses to love someone inevitably they are choosing to trust that other person. There are many 'types' of love...sibling and family love, and love. I think that romantic love and love for good friends are very similar. But I think that the core concept of love remains the same for any type of relationship.
Love is a promise. A promise to make good decisions for yourself and others you are involved with. A promise to continue to grow and improve upon weaknesses. A promise to be kind and patient. To let that person know you love them even at moments when they are at their worst. A promise to be there for them through their difficulties and not pull the rug out from underneath when they need you the most. A promise to trust that they are continuing to make decisions that are healthy for you and them.
Love is work. It takes a vast amount of commitment. In fact I read a book where it says after two years the 'infatuated love' wears off and the 'real' working love begins. I think I have always instinctively known this. It's not pessimistic. Fairy tale endings just don't happen in this world. Love doesn't end at a wedding. It has to continue. There will be many times when the people you love are unattractive and unappealing. Selfishness is what we are all fending off. Selfishness cannot exist around love. If one is truly committed and truly loving they will work through the difficulties. Do whatever it takes.
Love is sacrifice. If it were not than Jesus would have not come down here to save us from sin. One person should never sacrifice more than the other. That person who is not sacrificing anything is not truly loving the other. And the person sacrificing too much is not loving themselves...
My great grandfather told me that love is something that you work the hardest at your whole life and always feel like there is room for growing. No one has perfected love. Except God that is. Love is so phenomenal we will spend all our time in heaven and on the new earth contemplating it.
I can't wait for that.
I was doing devotions last night because I couldn't sleep, and I came to some cool realizations...simple ones..but sometimes we forget the simple things.
Love is interlinked with many things. Patience, kindness, trust...etc. When one chooses to love someone inevitably they are choosing to trust that other person. There are many 'types' of love...sibling and family love, and love. I think that romantic love and love for good friends are very similar. But I think that the core concept of love remains the same for any type of relationship.
Love is a promise. A promise to make good decisions for yourself and others you are involved with. A promise to continue to grow and improve upon weaknesses. A promise to be kind and patient. To let that person know you love them even at moments when they are at their worst. A promise to be there for them through their difficulties and not pull the rug out from underneath when they need you the most. A promise to trust that they are continuing to make decisions that are healthy for you and them.
Love is work. It takes a vast amount of commitment. In fact I read a book where it says after two years the 'infatuated love' wears off and the 'real' working love begins. I think I have always instinctively known this. It's not pessimistic. Fairy tale endings just don't happen in this world. Love doesn't end at a wedding. It has to continue. There will be many times when the people you love are unattractive and unappealing. Selfishness is what we are all fending off. Selfishness cannot exist around love. If one is truly committed and truly loving they will work through the difficulties. Do whatever it takes.
Love is sacrifice. If it were not than Jesus would have not come down here to save us from sin. One person should never sacrifice more than the other. That person who is not sacrificing anything is not truly loving the other. And the person sacrificing too much is not loving themselves...
My great grandfather told me that love is something that you work the hardest at your whole life and always feel like there is room for growing. No one has perfected love. Except God that is. Love is so phenomenal we will spend all our time in heaven and on the new earth contemplating it.
I can't wait for that.
Love and Growth.
I wrote this awhile ago, a good few months after a REALLY bad break up. I'm keeping it because it's amazing and empowering.
So the spring has arrived and early summer is setting in here in NE. I am gearing up for what I planned to be a great summer. I planned this summer back in January when I needed something to keep me occupied and working for. Things will be tight, but money is not what I am looking for right now.
I am looking for some type of fulfillment. I want satisfaction. I have come far. I have discovered new things about myself.
Come to find out I was just believing what others were telling me.
I have discovered that I am outgoing. I am a people person. I am NOT an introvert. I am perfectly in line with being outgoing and fun, but thinking with my head and being reserved when it suits me to be.
I am not even hard to get to know. I am extremly personable, and I am certianly more in touch with others feelings and thoughts than I give myself credit for.
I've learned to always trust my instincts. When something is bad I don't have to stick around. I don't have to push someone to be their best. I don't have to give things up. Anyone who is truly caring would find a happy medium, and that is when I will be willing to make sacrifices.
No more one sidedness. I have put too much on the line these past few years!
I am strong and independent. I sometimes let people have too much power over me. I am determined to fix that.
I am also extremely dedicated. Maybe it's okay to give someone a run for their money. I think I will relax in the dedication area.
I found out that I have absolutely amazing friends. I don't think that God could have given me a better support system.
I have also created new expectations for new relationships.
Loving someone is seeing their potential and inspiring them to reach it. It is also enduring someone at their worst. Loving someone is also working hard to reach your own potential.
Love is certainly not demanding. And it is most certainly patient.
If someone is choosing not to be their best, and you haven't promised to stick around for life...I say don't. It's not worth suffering through others decisions that aren't healthy for you and possibly not healthy for themselves.
I've decided if I cannot have an undemanding and patient love, I don't want it.
If I have to give up everything just to have love than I will choose not to. In the end Love is wanting the other to be happy, as well as wanting yourself to be happy too. And you should be number one, until you decide to be 1/2.
1/2! Not 2nd.
I am also still sticking with my old definition of Love is a promise. I will be excited to find a person who can keep it!
I love this growing thing. It's great!
So the spring has arrived and early summer is setting in here in NE. I am gearing up for what I planned to be a great summer. I planned this summer back in January when I needed something to keep me occupied and working for. Things will be tight, but money is not what I am looking for right now.
I am looking for some type of fulfillment. I want satisfaction. I have come far. I have discovered new things about myself.
Come to find out I was just believing what others were telling me.
I have discovered that I am outgoing. I am a people person. I am NOT an introvert. I am perfectly in line with being outgoing and fun, but thinking with my head and being reserved when it suits me to be.
I am not even hard to get to know. I am extremly personable, and I am certianly more in touch with others feelings and thoughts than I give myself credit for.
I've learned to always trust my instincts. When something is bad I don't have to stick around. I don't have to push someone to be their best. I don't have to give things up. Anyone who is truly caring would find a happy medium, and that is when I will be willing to make sacrifices.
No more one sidedness. I have put too much on the line these past few years!
I am strong and independent. I sometimes let people have too much power over me. I am determined to fix that.
I am also extremely dedicated. Maybe it's okay to give someone a run for their money. I think I will relax in the dedication area.
I found out that I have absolutely amazing friends. I don't think that God could have given me a better support system.
I have also created new expectations for new relationships.
Loving someone is seeing their potential and inspiring them to reach it. It is also enduring someone at their worst. Loving someone is also working hard to reach your own potential.
Love is certainly not demanding. And it is most certainly patient.
If someone is choosing not to be their best, and you haven't promised to stick around for life...I say don't. It's not worth suffering through others decisions that aren't healthy for you and possibly not healthy for themselves.
I've decided if I cannot have an undemanding and patient love, I don't want it.
If I have to give up everything just to have love than I will choose not to. In the end Love is wanting the other to be happy, as well as wanting yourself to be happy too. And you should be number one, until you decide to be 1/2.
1/2! Not 2nd.
I am also still sticking with my old definition of Love is a promise. I will be excited to find a person who can keep it!
I love this growing thing. It's great!
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